senioritis number 2

everyone knows i'm a big fan of awkward moments right. right, well, there's some awkward moments that i don't actually like. but i have to deal with these moments because my whole entire life is one big awkward moment and i realize i can't love all of it.

so i walk into my first english class of the semester and notice the teacher. she looks like a very nice lady. the second person i notice is another lady. blonde. hmm, oh i do know her! but i wish i didn't. i'm having a hard time explaining this so i'll just throw it out there.. i have a class with my ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend's mom. that sounds like it shouldn't matter to me but it somewhat does. because i used to go to church with my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend and his new girlfriend's mom. and we were all friends. we all loved eachother. it was nice. the whole church was nice. my ex-boyfriend's dad is also the pastor which in the end made it almost inevitably awkward and awful for me to go there. so i started going somewhere else despite the fact that that's a most likely awful reason to stop going to a certain church. anyways, my ex-boyfriend hasn't willingly talked to me in um, let's say forever. it's not like either of us really did anything to make one another highly dislike eachother, it was all a misunderstanding to say the least (i'm really not kidding. i told him i didn't think i loved him and so he took that as breaking up. i think that's dumb because i was only 16 and 16 year olds really don't have to have 'love' in their relationships). it's nothing. he stopped talking to me. anyways, that was all rambling and not the point. at all. the point is, i walked right past the woman and proceeded to as far away from her as possible. i didn't think she even noticed me. until. here's the big until. the class was over and i wanted to speed right out of there but she decided that she didn't want that to happen. instead, "oh hi sydney it's been a while since i've seen you, what've you been up to?"
pause.
really really long pause.
i didn't even know what to say.
i didn't even know if i should smile or not.
"oh, uh, hi"
"i thought you were still in high school."
"oh, uh, i am this is just, uh, post secondary. for college credit."
"that sounds pretty cool. i don't think they offer that at katie's* school."
pauce.
really really long pause.
katie* is the new girlfriend of my ex-boyfriend.
"oh, uh, that's too bad."
"so what other classes are you taking here?"
does she stop...
because considering the entire class was gone besides us two i thought it was time to leave. i showed my thoughts by slowly looking around the empty, quite, cold classroom.
"i won't hold you up any longer, we can catch up another day though okay."
okay. okay. catch up another day. sounds wonderful see you then! no but really, i didn't respond. i just stood there. almost stunned. it was awkward. then i felt like i was being rude. and now i feel like i'm going to be expected to almost be extremely friendly towards this woman.

this makes no sense to me.
(and probably not to you either because this story was all over the place)

*name changed because i said so.

just a simple shout out to those of you who actually read anything i ever post.

p.s. these pictures are way old.

senioritis number 1

so basically i had planned on starting an entire new blog entitles 'Senioritis' but I'm not sure if I'll actually be able to keep up with that because I barely keep up with this one regardless. So randomly throughout my wonderful, amazing, terrible senior year I may or may not have senioritis posts just for fun and suchness. Enjoy it or not.

Walking into school today was a pointless experience. I only have one class at the highschool and it was one hundred percent completely unnecessary for me to be there. First period economics. I don't care about economics. We had a survey sheet and one of the questions asked how much we wanted to learn about it and I chose the lowest response because as you know, I'm honest like that. And my friend Daniel and I have decided to call our teacher Ke$ha because he said he's bad with names and he gets annoyed when people pronounce his name wrong so we should correct him. But well, actually there's not really any legitimate reason but that's okay. I also realize that I sort of kind of almost dated two people in my class, so this should be interesting. Or not. Probably not because I'm not a very interesting person. I liked the way Ke$ha described the dress code though: "If you come to school looking like you might arrive in a scene on the Jersey Shore, then the outfit is not appropriate." or "If it looks like I have to tip you twenty dollars on the way out of the classroom and I have to lie to my wife about seeing you in what you were wearing, then the outfit is not appropriate." I think I might like this guy. He's honest, and has a SmartBoard. Works for me.

Oh, and then I came home and took a nap. What a great first day!

i'm missing half of me

sometimes i look over and see
my left arm dangling, falling
over the railing on the stairs

and when i go to scratch my back
i can’t reach from all the way
over there. stretching my fingers

across the room really is a long
way to go for an itch that won’t
stop. or in a business meeting i

feel those needles, staples, pinecones
of my legs telling me to uncross them,
but my leg is tangled in the

chandelier. a piece of artwork for
show. and watching my favorite movie next
to you in the cold living room as my

bad habit takes over and my ring finger
needs to be relieved, cracked—pulled
apart and off of me. but it’s already gone.

things to do before school starts (not that anybody reading this would really care)

1. buy my books
2. go to cedar point
3. figure out my feelings for this certain person/decide if i actually want a relationship gasp
4. reorganize all my playlists on itunes (because for anybody who was wondering my music was just hiding somewhere on my computer and i had to find it)
5. get rid of the millions of tshirts that i don't wear (and pretty much keep the 10 that i do.
6. figure out my phone problems
7. read the great gatspy, again (not because i have to)
8. have a Saw marathon with heather
9. play monopoly with shlee.
10. clean my room (i always seem to be doing that)

hello, cheesy lyrics.

thank you katy perry. i don't even care if her song is just like every other song ever created for teenage girls to love and think it's the best song ever. i'm kind of in a really good mood because of this song.



and i really really really can't wait to see this movie:

nothing is going right today.

1. i woke up late.
2. iTunes deleted all of my music.
3. i wore jeans when it was clearly too hot.
4. they wouldn't let me schedule my english class
5. they wouldn't let me buy my books for school.
6. the target school supply section is less than amazing.
7. my mosquito bites are killing me.
8. i'm sweating hot and i'm inside my house. it should be nice in here.

good cop, bad cop.

so yesterday, i guess i was a bad kid. and this will not be a list. nor will it be a poem. i'm just overly bored so i need to type SOMETHING. yesterday i was somewhere were i wasn't supposed to be and at a time when i wasn't supposed to be at it. i arrived at denny's at 1:45 in the morning when i called my mom. i called her to tell her that my friends and i were going to denny's (she didn't know that i was already there, and i WAS supposed to be home at 1:30). well, needless to say, she was a little upset that i wasn't at home. at that point a little buzzer went off in my head that said "get home as fast as you can because she thinks you're five minutes away from home but really you're twenty, but it's also past curfew so you should probably not go very fast and get pulled over like you did on the way there" (which was actually on the way to frisbee before going to eat).

pause.

i didn't mention getting pulled over on the way there. well, i did. but i didn't get a ticket. apparently i'm sweet and innocent and the police men just feel kind of bad for me or something. because when he asked
"so why were you going so fast?"
my immediate and completely one hundred percent honest response was "let me start off by saying i'm extremely sorry and it won't happen again. it's just that a really good song came on and i started singing along and i was paying attention and being safe with everything i could have been, besides my speed. and i am also late for playing frisbee with my friends."
then his response: "you're playing frisbee at 9:30 at night? isn't it a bit dark?"
me: "we have a light up frisbee!
guy: "awesome, well, let me just go check out your license and i'll be right back"
waiting waiting waiting waiting
guy: "i'm not going to give you a ticket. and i don't want to hold you up any longer. have a great night!"
me: "oh thank you very much, you have a wonderful night as well!"

unpause.

so that didn't go too badly. on the way home, was a different story. i was speeding again. for obvious reasons of getting home before my mom got mad at me. i should have thought it through that my mom would get even more mad at me if i ended up getting pulled over and getting a ticket. which is exactly what ended up happening. he didn't even give me a chance. he didn't even let me explain myself. he just said, "you were speeding, please don't get out of the car and i'll be right back." in the meantime, my gas gage was really low so i was also worrying about that. this guy took about twenty minutes to write the ticket in his car. unnecessary? i think so. especially since when he came back he wasn't even finished and had to ask me about a million irrelevant questions such as "are you married?" to complete the ticket. AND THEN, when i said "have a good night" he didn't even respond to me. immature. i'm helping him actually have a job to do, he should be thankful for idiotic kids like me.

anyways, i'm basically on house arrest for somewhere between two weeks and a month. we'll see how that goes. on the bright side, my dad ended up getting the ticket leaved because he's awesome and i love him and he's a firefighter and knows people. i'm somewhat okay with being grounded though because if i was not, i doubt i would have ever finished my summer reading. but now i have plenty of time. and my dad told me i had to volunteer to help a special ed teacher in an elementary school which i am completely okay with. so being grounded shouldn't be toooooo awful.

since when is it august?

oh, four days ago. i know. i'm not THAT stupid, or am i?

things i like about the fact that school is about to happen again:
1. the fact that other people are at band camp, and i'm not :)
2. new school supply shopping
3. finding out who's in my classes
4. homedays are soon enough.
5. trying to fit a million gajillion plans into just a few weeks, but it always ends up working out perfectly.

things that i hate about the fact that school is about to happen again:
1. some friends are going off to college again. including my best friend, which makes me entirely to sad to comprehend.
2. not being able to stay out until late on weeknights.
3. useless drama that i don't want to be a part of.
4. more than half of the people i've become really close to at work are leaving for college and moving on with life. i didn't think this would make me as sad as i am. but only two people who have been there longer than me are staying. only six of us 'veterans' are staying at all. fifteen (give or take a few) new kids are coming in and i DO like meeting new people but i loved the people i worked with. ugh ugh ugh
5. responsibilities.

i could keep adding to both these lists. but for the sake of saving space on the world wide web, i shall stop.